Hateful, Party of One

Friday, May 02, 2008

Single and loving it

So my friend sent me an interesting article about gay couples at a young age settling down and getting married. You should read the article. It elicited a very interesting conversation. He was saying that he was offended because the article gave the impression that young men don't know anything about relationships and that type of coupling is seen as immature and not realistic. My friend's background is one that he coupled at a young age and they are still together, over 7 years.

My background to the article was completely different. I was offended because it portrayed the only ok situation to be one where an individual is coupled. That those who remain single are sick and need to be cured. I am single by my own choice (despite those recent postings about crushing on my ex) and i am content with that. I have high enough self-esteem that I know I can be a complete individual without someone else there. Could it be nice, if the right guy was there that I was in love with? sure. Am I less of a person because I am single, or have been for a while? No.

I once read a book about being single and it was dead on. Gay and Single... Forever? It was a very interesting book on gay relationships and friendships. Made a lot of sense and the author has a very compelling argument that society sets us up for failure because they tell us all the time that its unnatural to be single, which makes us codependent on the need for someone else. We jump into relationships that are horribly wrong for us because we fear aloneness.

Well I enjoy being alone sometimes and do not need someone there all the time. I do not need to date if the guy is the wrong person and I'm ok with that. I am still a confident and happy person, despite what the NYT tells me.

What are your thoughts on the article? Being single? Being in a relationship?

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2 Comments:

  • At 10:07 PM , Blogger joe*to*hell said...

    well i WANT to comment. and i WANT to read the article

    but i am too lazy to sign up for NYT online.

    alli know is this: sooner or later, we all sleep alone.

     
  • At 6:01 AM , Blogger Topher said...

    I hear ya on that one.. It's like society tells you there's something wrong if you're not with someone. And from what I've seen, people stay in relationships just for the sake of staying even though it's not doing them any good. Granted it's nice to have someone, but it's not really all that is cracked up to be. Lol (Not that i'm complaining)

    I think people really need to be comfortable with themselves before getting into one. I dunno, it just feels like it makes a huge difference that you can stand being with your self, instead of seeking out to others to feel validated...

     

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